Revenge is Mine

When I lost my Macbook in KL I had to visit an internet café to do travel plans and work. I made good friends with the nice and kind sales attendant at my favorite internet café in JL Bukit Bintang. We exchange pleasantries,  small talk and tell her she’s the first Burmese person I met. Once, on my visit she warned me about a big burly man who just about asked EVERY woman inside the internet café to go out with him. The kind of man who would hit on a post as long it’s wearing a skirt.

True to my Burmese’ friends’ warning, the man approached me then hilarity ensues:

Big Surly Guy: Excuse me. Are you from the Philippines or Thailand?

Me: Uhm. Manila

Big Surly Guy: Do you know how to travel fo Baguio or Manila?

Me: Uhm. You take a bus.

Big Surly Guy: Is there a plane that flies to Baguio from Manila.

Me: I dunno. Just take the bus.

Big Surly Guy: No planes?

Me: (annoyed) Yeah, there are an antiquated few.

Big Surly Guy: Do you think Filipinas would date outside of their race? What’s your opinion on this?

Me: ( I was really uncomforatable at this point. Go away, I’m trying to work!) I dunno. But we don’t like annoying foreigners in general.

Big Surly Guy: What would you say if I ask you to go out with me?

Me: Oh. I am sorry. I am taken.

Big Surly Guy: I’m sorry. He is a lucky guy. He should marry you.

Me: Really? Are you sure? How can you be so sure? Here! *I pound the goddamn table* (I was half agitated, annoyed and sarcastic.) Go talk to him in Yahoo! Voice, maybe he will listen to you! (This time I really raise my voice and began mimicking a cry) I mean good god! I didn’t mean to kill his Siamese cat! I swear to god it was a drowning accident!

The guy was surprised and weirded out since everybody in the internet café was looking at us. He left, to the relief of the women in the internet café.

There was no guy on the other end of the chat. I was talking to my 8 year old nephew in Facebook chat about how I think he looks like Justin Bieber.

My acting and drama lessons in elementary school paid off well.