Motorbike is the most popular form of transportation in Vietnam. Here, they can carry everything and almost anything in a bike or motorbike - from boxes, butchered pigs, personal fridge, HD TV's, computers, etc. During Tet (Vietnamese New Year) most people can be seen carrying cherry blossom potted trees in their motobaiks.



Like your regular car taxis here, xe om is an unregulated industry. This means anyone with a license  to drive a motorbike can be a xe om driver.  The xe om drivers near touristy areas loves to inflate prices by a mile. A German friend and me also had the unpleasant and funny experience of being harassed by a drunk xe om driver. He was pestering us to take his xe om in his slurring speech.

I like Xe Om (motorbike taxis) rides in the morning when there is no traffic in the crazy streets of Hanoi. I like the wind blowing through my hair. Channeling Audrey Hepburn in Roman Holiday except its not Gregory Peck driving but some crazy speed devil driver.

On my to West Lake yesterday, out of the blue, the same old xe om driver in the corner shouted "Pilipin!" as if he had hit the jackpot of correctly guessing where I'm from. I don't have a choice of avoiding him as I must pass that corner when going to the nearest grocery store. He had been guessing my nationality since he first saw me holding a map of Hanoi (Aha! tourist!). His first guess, was Lao. I shook my head and said "Nope" smiled and went about my business.

After a week, he was in his favorite spot under a tree. This time he said "Thailand."  I smiled and said "nope." Well, this week he finally guessed it right. But, only because I passed by there the other day wearing a "Pinay" shirt.

In the street where I stay, there are two xe om drivers that I like because they give me fair prices and they have their own "styles". One of them is nice lady xe om driver. Being a woman, this does not mean she is not a dare devil. She likes beating the red light too like so many ordinary motorbike drivers. That is not my pet peeve though. She makes me religious when I'm a non-believer. I do a bit of praying when we pass by the shopping district of Hoan Kiem. Window shopping is her favorite past time while on the job. Once, she didn't stop looking at a formal ball gown displayed in one of the shops while driving of course.  Ah, women, no matter what age and race, shopping is a universal language.

Last, is my all time favorite old xe om driver. An old man probably in his seventies. I feel safe in his hands. He is careful when driving. So careful that it usually takes me twice the amount of time to get to my destination. Sometimes he takes me to longer scenic routes, which I don't mind but it makes me wonder if the fare we agreed upon is enough to earn him a profit.

Too bad now I actually prefer walking rather than taking short motorbike rides as I am trying to meet the 10,000-steps-a-day health routine. Those motorbike drivers could be quite a character!

 

Lost in Translation

Old posts from my defunct blog:

I've been taking Mai Lihn cabs in Vietnam since they are a trust worthy taxi company. The cab drivers always know where to take you even though one has poor pronunciation of Vietnamese places.

Today was different. I took a cab from District 1, HCMC and....

Me: Chinatown please...Chinatown...Do you know Chinatown?

Driver: Yes, yes! Shay-na-ton, Shay-na-ton!

Assuming Chinatown was a popular market among tourists in Saigon, I believed him when he said yes.

After five minutes we have arrived at our destination.

Driver: Shay-na-ton! Shay-na-ton!

I looked to my left where the driver was pointing. Oh yes, it was Sheraton (Hotel).

I found the whole thing hilarious, I just paid him 20.000 VND that reflected on the meter. Took another cab near Shay-na-ton Hotel to take me to Chinatown.

All busy in the North Korean front.

It's all happening in DPRK at the moment as the new chosen leader will ascend into the North Korean dynasty soon. North Korea still remains in my top dream destination, obviously not for the non-tourist attractions but the enigma that it is. Now that North Korea has already picked a young  successor, Kim Jong Un, everyone wonders if his era would usher in a more open North Korea.

That's not the interesting bit of story though.

Kim Jong Un was not the first in  line to ascend to the North Korean throne. Instead, his older half brother, Kim Jong Nam  was being groomed to replace the North Korean lineage. All these plans crumbled into pieces when in 2001, Kim Jong Nam was caught using a fake passport in Japan in his attempt to visit the happiest place on earth, North Korea Disneyland. The incident left a great deal embarrassment for Kim Jong Il, enough for him to cancel an important trip to China. Kim Jong Nam then, has fallen out of favor to inherit the North Korean leadership.

Kim Jong Il and the story of succession of the North Korean leadership is entangled in a complex story of his personal life. Kim Jong Il is a Casanova-wannabe. He had a long string of mistresses and affairs. A riveting tale of love, lust, secret affairs, mistresses, war, murder, espionage and power struggle. It has all the elements of an epic Korean soap drama. It will be like Jewel in the Palace minus the cooking.

If Yes is the answer, then what is the question?

If you have walked through the main streets of Central Ubud, you have probably been asked a thousand times by random tourists touts, drivers, vendors etc. - "Yes. Transport". I'm not sure if it's a question or a genuine offer. It always sounded like a statement rather than a question.

One is always tempted to ask "Yes, to what? Transport, to where? Yes, to what?". I do my best to grin and bear the occasional annoyance. Although there are times when I do my quiet morning Jalan-Jalan walks and then somebody hijacks my peaceful morning with that statement "Yes. Transport".

The only problem I have with that phrase - "Yes, Transport." is that the instant moment I hear it, I visualize time machines. Transport = Time Machine. Always. Never fails.  The first time a taxi cab driver said "Yes, Transport." to me I had to smile. I had visions of Debbie Gibson singing live in my head. Yeah. For 200,000 rupiah.  I'm so there.

Hey, sorry for the crappy drawing. Yes, someone used the descriptive sound of "vrroom. vrooom." on me when I ignored his transportation services offer. The guy thought I didn't understand English so he resorted to making sounds fit for a three year old kid. I regret now that I didn't turn my back and say to him, "Vrooom? Vrooom? Dude, I'm not fucking three years old. Now, I pay you good money. Just transport me to 1987."

Rocket Man

She packed my bags last night pre-flight
Zero hour nine a.m.
And I'm gonna be high as a kite by then
I miss the earth so much I miss my wife
It's lonely out in space
On such a timeless flight

And I think it's gonna be a long long time
Till touch down brings me round again to find
I'm not the man they think I am at home
Oh no no no I'm a rocket man
Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone

Mars ain't the kind of place to raise your kids
In fact it's cold as hell
And there's no one there to raise them if you did
And all this science I don't understand
It's just my job five days a week
A rocket man, a rocket man

And I think it's gonna be a long long time...

New Postcards from Bali!

Revenge is Mine

When I lost my Macbook in KL I had to visit an internet café to do travel plans and work. I made good friends with the nice and kind sales attendant at my favorite internet café in JL Bukit Bintang. We exchange pleasantries,  small talk and tell her she’s the first Burmese person I met. Once, on my visit she warned me about a big burly man who just about asked EVERY woman inside the internet café to go out with him. The kind of man who would hit on a post as long it’s wearing a skirt.

True to my Burmese’ friends’ warning, the man approached me then hilarity ensues:

Big Surly Guy: Excuse me. Are you from the Philippines or Thailand?

Me: Uhm. Manila

Big Surly Guy: Do you know how to travel fo Baguio or Manila?

Me: Uhm. You take a bus.

Big Surly Guy: Is there a plane that flies to Baguio from Manila.

Me: I dunno. Just take the bus.

Big Surly Guy: No planes?

Me: (annoyed) Yeah, there are an antiquated few.

Big Surly Guy: Do you think Filipinas would date outside of their race? What’s your opinion on this?

Me: ( I was really uncomforatable at this point. Go away, I’m trying to work!) I dunno. But we don’t like annoying foreigners in general.

Big Surly Guy: What would you say if I ask you to go out with me?

Me: Oh. I am sorry. I am taken.

Big Surly Guy: I’m sorry. He is a lucky guy. He should marry you.

Me: Really? Are you sure? How can you be so sure? Here! *I pound the goddamn table* (I was half agitated, annoyed and sarcastic.) Go talk to him in Yahoo! Voice, maybe he will listen to you! (This time I really raise my voice and began mimicking a cry) I mean good god! I didn’t mean to kill his Siamese cat! I swear to god it was a drowning accident!

The guy was surprised and weirded out since everybody in the internet café was looking at us. He left, to the relief of the women in the internet café.

There was no guy on the other end of the chat. I was talking to my 8 year old nephew in Facebook chat about how I think he looks like Justin Bieber.

My acting and drama lessons in elementary school paid off well.